The beginning

It started almost 7 years ago on Dec 21, 2009.  Upset after taking my kids and step-daughter to see the holiday lights and have hot chocolate alone, I confronted my husband as to why he had skipped out on this family tradition.  Sitting at the computer desk he looked at me and said “I hate you and I don’t want to be around you,  I’m just trying to get through the holidays and then we will figure out what’s next.”  Two weeks later I was siting in a therapist’s office throwing up into her waste paper basket after I just said the words, “We are not separating, we are getting a divorce.” I walked out of that appointment, did what I always did and called my friends crying with the news.  I went home and crawled into bed and mourned the loss of my childhood dream,  a happy family with rich traditions and family togetherness.  I wept for the firsts I would be absent for as a “part-time” parent.  I was afraid of what was ahead.  Who would love me? Would I remarry? Would I go broke?  Where would I live? I was broken hearted for the pain I was sure my children would endure and the weight of that guilt was crushing.  I had failed them as their mother.  I had failed at giving them a happy family.  As my son Jaxon tells it, “Mom cried for three days in her room.”  I think his little 4 year old self remembers that incorrectly, but that’s neither here nor there.  Except that I’m always right… In any case, there WAS a lot of crying.

Little did I know on that painful day what a turning point it would be for me.  7 years later I often say it was the absolute best decision of my life.  My journey as a single mother has not been without its ups and downs (sometimes a lot more downs than ups) but it has caused me to grow in ways I never thought possible.

I’ve  shared parts of my journey on Facebook over the years and various people have encouraged me to start a blog or write a book (did they miss that I am a single mom with no time?!?!) documenting the funny stories that I tell.  This blog will do that but will also share the not so funny moments of this journey, hard parts and all.  It will be a drama/comedy. Depending on the day.  Who am I kidding? Depending on the moment.

Since I’m up early, have the day off from both work and parenting AND got a good nights sleep (a trifecta that is very rare) I decided to create the blog.  I’ll call it a “Black Friday Miracle” because it sure beats waiting in long shopping lines.

I hope you enjoy!